


The Return of Porygon

by Kyarorain



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-24
Updated: 2011-09-24
Packaged: 2018-05-07 03:20:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5441558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyarorain/pseuds/Kyarorain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ash, Brock and Dawn stumble upon the Pokémon Mansion and end up being subjected to strange antics thanks to some mischievous Pokémon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Return of Porygon

**The Return of Porygon**  
  
  
 

* * *

  
  
Poor Porygon, it gets shunned for something that it wasn't even responsible for. So far, we haven't seen Porygon2 and may never see Porygon-Z. Since there can be Porygon found in Mr. Backlot's garden, I wrote a fic about it. It also brings up a possible answer for... well, just where does Backlot's butler get those Pokémon?  
  
Pokémon is owned by Game Freak and Nintendo. I own nothing, naturally.

* * *

 

_Ash has just left Pastoria City after winning the Fen Badge from Crasher Wake. He is now returning to Hearthome City in the hopes of challenging the fifth gym. Along the way, however, Ash, Brock and Dawn have happened to come across a place known as the Pokémon Mansion. What lies in store for them here?_

A tall man in an expensive looking suit was standing on the doorstep of the Pokémon Mansion, smiling down at the three young Pokémon trainers who were standing before him with curious expressions on their faces. "Welcome to the Pokémon Mansion, home of Sinnoh's famous Trophy Garden," he announced, sweeping his arm in a grand gesture. "It's a treat for Pokémon trainers."

"Trophy Garden?" Ash Ketchum repeated, his dark brown eyes shining in excitement. It certainly sounded like it was worth his time. "Alright then, I'm going to go in there!" he exclaimed, raising a fist. "But, wait, what is this Trophy Garden anyway?"

The blue-haired girl standing next to Ash turned to him with a look of surprise, which quickly cleared when she remembered that he wasn't even from Sinnoh in the first place. "I know what the Trophy Garden is," Dawn said. "My mom's mentioned it to me before. It's this huge garden where Pokémon trainers are free to walk around and look for wild Pokémon, then they can catch them. Apparently, there are some very rare Pokémon kept in there too."

"Eh? Rare Pokémon?" Ash looked astonished. The yellow mouse Pokémon, Pikachu, who sat on his shoulder also looked quite surprised. How could someone actually have their own garden full of wild, rare Pokémon? It almost seemed too good to be true. "Well, if there are rare Pokémon in there, then I want to go in and see them!"

"Pika!" Pikachu chimed in enthusiastically.

"This is incredible," Dawn gushed, turning back to face the door. She looked down at her Pokémon, Piplup, whom she was holding in her arms. "I've always wanted to come and see the famous Pokémon Mansion."

"Pip, piplup," Piplup chirped, waving its arms.

"I still can't get over how amazing this place looks," Brock, the tallest of the three, commented as he looked around at the manicured garden and the impressive looking mansion. "The owner must be really rich. I wonder how he managed to get so many Pokémon, even rare ones."

"Come on in then," the man said, stepping back inside the mansion. "I will take you to see the owner of the mansion, Mr. Backlot."

"Alright!" Ash cheered, hurrying into the mansion. Brock and Dawn followed after him and the man shut the door behind them.

Unknown to them, the entire conversation had been overheard. Two people in white Team Rocket uniforms and a Meowth peered over the bush, gazing at the mansion with devious grins on their faces. They simply couldn't believe what they had stumbled upon.

"The perfect opportunity has just fallen into our laps." Jessie's grin widened and she turned her head to look at her indigo-haired companion. "A garden full of rare Pokémon. Can you believe it?"

"I know. It seems like our luck has finally changed!" James cried happily. The two clasped hands, tears of happiness running down their faces.

"We gotta go in there and steal dem rare Pokémon for da boss!" Meowth declared. "Den we'll get a promotion at last. That garden is in for a real pruning."

"I wonder what rare Pokémon they must have in there," James mused. "There's bound to be something the boss will like."

"Maybe dere will be all kinds of legendary Pokémon like Suicune or Celebi." Meowth's eyes shone in delight. "Da boss will become da most powerful Pokémon trainer in da world with dem legendarys, no, a Pokémon Master, and den he will say 'I have Meowth and friends to thank for becoming a Pokémon Master. I must reward them with a promotion.'"

Jessie's fist crashed into his head, breaking off his delightful fantasy. "Don't be ridiculous! There's no way the guy could have so many legendary Pokémon."

"Why would he want to become a Pokémon Master when he's already the leader of Team Rocket?" James asked, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.

"You know, I like it better when you guys go along with my fantasies instead," Meowth said grumpily, rubbing the top of his head.

"Well, that one didn't even make any sense," James said. He turned his head, looking at the mansion. "So, that guy looks pretty rich, doesn't he?"

"I wonder what's inside that mansion?" Jessie gazed at the building in awe. "There must be all kinds of expensive treasure in there as well. We could maybe take some of it and sell it for money too."

"Maybe... there's a room in there, full of bottle caps..." James was now off in his own daydream, thinking of a room crammed to the ceiling full of nothing but the bottle caps he loved so much.

"There might even be a luxurious spa in there to relax in and a handsome male servant who is willing to tend to my every need and give me massages." Jessie let out a deep sigh of longing.

Meowth looked from Jessie to James and hung his head, groaning in exasperation. "So I get hit for having a fantasy and you two go on and do it anyway? I don't see how that's fair," he muttered.

Meanwhile, Ash, Dawn and Brock were now inside the mansion and standing before Mr. Backlot himself. He was a rounded, middle-aged man wearing very expensive looking clothes. "So, the three of you are Pokémon trainers? I hear you're hoping to have a look in my fine Trophy Garden."

"So you are Mr. Backlot, owner of the Trophy Garden and Amity Square?" Dawn clasped her hands, looking positively joyful. "I can't believe I'm actually getting to meet the famous Mr. Backlot. Can I have your autograph?" She pulled a notebook and a pen out of nowhere. Piplup, sitting on her head, seemed quite taken aback by his trainer's odd behaviour. Rarely did Dawn go this crazy.

"Is it true that you have loads of rare Pokémon in your garden?" Ash asked, his words coming out so fast in his excitement that everyone could barely understand what he was even saying. "How did you manage to get them all? If they are wild, then that means you didn't catch them, right? So how did you do it?"

"Will you two please calm down?" Brock massaged his forehead in exasperation. Their enthusiasm was giving him a headache.

Mr. Backlot chuckled, not at all bothered by the verbal onslaught he had just received. He took the paper and pen from Dawn. "So, what's your name?" As Dawn replied, he scribbled down a message and handed it back to her. The mansion owner then turned to look at Ash. "I'm afraid that it's a secret as to how I obtained them, but yes, I do have quite a lot of rare Pokémon. I love to take walks in my Trophy Garden and walk with the Pokémon there. Just yesterday, I was walking and then this cute little Porygon came up to me..."

The butler, who stood next to Mr. Backlot, turned around in alarm. "Sir!" he hissed, getting Mr. Backlot's attention. He then frantically whispered into his ear, "We don't have any Porygon in the garden. It's supposed to be banned anyway!"

Mr. Backlot's expression changed to one of alarm. He glanced at the three Pokémon trainers before him. "Well, go and find a Porygon anyway!" he whispered to the butler. "I just told these people there's a Porygon in the garden, so you're going to have to get one. Please don't make me look like a liar."

"You _are_ a liar," the butler wanted to say. Instead, he backed away and nodded hastily. "Of course, I'll go and do it right away!" He turned and fled from the room.

Mr. Backlot turned to face the confused trainers with a big grin. "Anyway, the Trophy Garden is a lot of fun. You are welcome to go and check it out. Who knows, maybe you will even see a Porygon yourselves!" His chest shook with laughter.

"Right, like we're going to see a Porygon," Ash said dryly, giving Mr. Backlot a sceptical look. "I haven't seen one since my first Pokémon journey and that was how long ago?"

Mr. Backlot leaned forward, sticking his face right in Ash's and causing him to lean back with a startled expression. "There. Are. Porygon. In. The. Trophy. Garden," he insisted in a sharp voice, putting on a very big, fake smile.

"Heh, okay... if you say so." Ash smiled awkwardly and stepped back, holding up his hands. A huge bead of sweat rolled down his head.

"Well then, let's stop wasting time!" Dawn grabbed onto Ash's arm and started pulling him away. "Let's go and check out the Trophy Garden now!"

"Was it just me or did Mr. Backlot seem a bit strange?" Brock wondered as they left the room. "It almost looked as if he had something to hide."

The group headed through the mansion to a door labelled "Trophy Garden this way" and walked through it, stepping outside. They gasped in amazement as they saw a large garden before them. Countless Pokémon could be seen, looking quite comfortable for wild Pokémon trapped in some rich guy's back garden.

"Wow! There are so many Pokémon!" Ash exclaimed. He certainly hadn't been expecting to see this many. Just how did Mr. Backlot do it?

"Incredible," Dawn breathed, walking through a patch of grass and turning around, looking amazed. "This garden is so much bigger than I thought it would be."

"I can't believe how many different Pokémon there are." Brock followed along behind the two as they walked through the garden. "They don't seem to mind being kept in a garden at all."

Ash and Dawn had their Pokédexes at the ready, identifying almost every Pokémon that came across their path. Even ones they had seen before, but that was to be expected.

"Pory!" A Porygon suddenly appeared before the three Pokémon trainers. They stared in shock at the pink and blue Pokémon, which blinked at them and did a happy little jig.

"Wha-what..." Ash's mouth flapped open. "Is that really a Porygon?" He thrust the Pokédex forward for reassurance.

"Porygon, the Shunned Pokémon," said the Pokédex. "It is blamed for the infamous seizure incident, which was actually your own Pikachu's fault."

"Pika!" Pikachu hung its ears and looked ashamed, as Ash stared at the Pokédex with a shocked expression. His Pokédex didn't usually talk like that.

"Pory, porygon," the Porygon tittered. It had just manipulated the Pokédex, being a computer Pokémon itself.

"Sheesh. What's wrong with your Pokédex, Ash?" Dawn pointed her own Pokédex toward Porygon.

"Porygon, the Virtual Pokémon. The world's first artificially created Pokémon. It can travel through electronic space." Porygon had decided to let Dawn's Pokédex tell the truth.

"It apparently likes breaking the fourth wall too." Ash put away the Pokédex, giving Porygon a reproachful look. "It's not nice to play with my Pokédex."

"It might just be my imagination, but you seem to be slightly bitter about your situation," Brock said, looking at the Porygon. "I guess it can't be a coincidence you haven't appeared again. It's too bad those two evolutions of yours probably won't either."

"Gon, porygon!" Porygon squeaked, looking thoroughly agitated. It grew to three times its size, startling Ash, Brock and Dawn. "Porygon!"

"Pika, pikachu!" Pikachu cried out, waving an arm in protest. "Chu."

"Piplup, pip," Piplup added, looking a little fierce.

"Um... I have a bad feeling all of a sudden..." Ash said nervously, taking a step back.

"Me too." Dawn watched the Porygon with a cautious look. "Uh... maybe we should go now?" she asked, glancing at her companions.

"That sounds like a good idea," Brock agreed.

"PORY!" Porygon's eyes glowed blue. "GON!"

Ash, Brock and Dawn were suddenly pulled into some strange warp along with Porygon. The three surprised trainers and their Pokémon fell screaming through a winding tunnel of darkness. Blue 1s and 0s whizzed past them as they plummeted. Porygon had disappeared, leaving them to fall by themselves.

Just before they hit the ground below, a blue light surrounded the trio and slowed down their descent so that they landed safely. They were now in a room with steel walls. There was no ceiling, just the empty darkness above their heads with binary numbers swirling around. The only exit from this room was a single door with a numeric keypad next to it. A large screen above the door flickered into life, displaying Porygon.

" **Welcome to my world, beings of the flesh,** " said an electronic voice.

"Aah!" Dawn squeaked in fear and clung to Ash, looking around wildly. "What was that just now?"

"Porygon, this is your doing, isn't it?" Ash looked up at the screen accusingly. "What are you playing at?"

"Just where are we?" Brock asked, looking up in confusion. "Why am I seeing 1s and 0s all over the... uh, whatever that is, because it sure isn't the sky."

" **This is the electronic world,** " the voice said. " **You will be trapped here forever.** "

"Forever?" Dawn repeated, her eyes widening in horror.

" **Unless... you can solve my puzzles.** "

"Alright, bring them on! We can do this," Ash said confidently, forgetting that he wasn't even very good at puzzles for that matter.

" **Very well. To get through this door, you must solve at least two out of three mathematical problems. Tap your answer in on the keypad.** "

Below the Porygon on the screen, large white text appeared. It read **5 x 5 = ?**

"Well, we're screwed," Brock said sarcastically. "How can we possibly solve that?"

"That's all you've got?" Ash walked up to the keypad with a big grin on his face. "Even I can answer that." He then tapped in his answer.

Brock and Dawn gaped at the screen in shock as **55** appeared next to the equal sign.

"How's that?" Ash asked as he pushed the button that read "Enter".

"Ash, no!" Dawn cried out, holding her head in her hands with a despairing look.

" **Incorrect.** " The Porygon on the screen shook its head dismally.

Ash facefaulted, his smug expression quickly replaced with one of utter shock. "What... you mean I was wrong?"

"Pi, pi." Pikachu nodded, looking exasperated.

" **You really are a dumbass. You couldn't even solve the simplest problem. Were you born without a brain or something?** "

"Why you..." Ash clenched his fists furiously. "I bet I can answer the next one easily."

" **Oh, really? Fine, here's the next one.** "

Underneath the Porygon, the text now read **151** \+ **100 + 135 + 107 = ?**

"Wait, Ash!" Brock ran forward and stopped him before he could angrily punch in his answer. "It's my turn now."

"But..." Ash sighed and stepped back in defeat, his shoulders slumping. Who was he kidding, he would only mess this one up as well and they would end up trapped here forever.

"Let's see." Brock rubbed his chin thoughtfully as he gazed up at the screen. "Hmm, those numbers seem familiar." A lightbulb appeared above his head. "That's it!" He quickly tapped in 493, then pressed Enter.

" **Correct.** " The Porygon was now dancing a little jig.

"How did you know the answer so quickly, Brock?" Ash asked, looking at him in surprise.

"Those numbers were the amount of Pokémon that was discovered each time," Brock replied. "Well, technically, we shouldn't know about the existence of the 493rd Pokémon just yet, but nobody cares anyway."

" **A sharp mind you have indeed. But can you solve this last problem?** "

The text beneath the Porygon changed to read **956 x 17302 + 473921047 = ?**

"So many numbers..." Ash's eyes started swirling as he tried to read them. "It's making my head hurt."

"Are you kidding me?" Brock yelled, shaking his fist at the screen. "How do you expect me to answer such a ridiculous question like that?"

The electronic voice just laughed. " **Well then, I guess you will be trapped here forever.** "

"Move aside!" Dawn pushed herself between Ash and Brock, marching up to the keypad with a fierce look. "No need to worry, I know what the answer is."

The two boys stared up at the screen in shock as Dawn typed in a long answer. A tense silence followed as they waited for the voice to answer.

" **Correct.** "

"What?" They yelled in unison, turning to look at Dawn with stunned expressions.

"Well, I don't like to brag..." Dawn put her hands on her hips, grinning and looking pleased with herself. "But I am a genius when it comes to math."

"Piplup!" Piplup chirped angrily from her head, waving its flippers. "Piplup, pip!"

"Oh..." Dawn slumped over, a blue aura surrounding her in her misery. "That's right, you saw me." She stood up and brandished her Pokétch in Ash and Brock's faces, smiling sheepishly. "Actually, I just used the Calculator App on my Pokétch." Ash and Brock reacted by crashing to the floor.

" **Now that you have solved two out of three puzzles, you may proceed to the next room,** " announced the voice. " **Have fun.** "

The door slid open, revealing the way to a new room. Ash, Brock and Dawn passed through the doorway into a room full of psychedelic colours and flashing lights. It was almost enough to give them major headaches, but somehow they were able to withstand it.

"Now it's time for a new game!" Something that resembled Porygon had appeared before them. It looked like Porygon, but it had a much rounder body.

"Huh? This is..." Ash took out the Pokédex again.

"Porygon2, the Pokémon that the anime pretends doesn't exist," said the Pokédex. "It hails all the way back from Generation 2, but the anime still hasn't shown it for obvious reasons. It's so infuriating."

"Stop playing with my Pokédex!" Ash yelled in frustration.

"Geez..." Dawn shook her head as she took out her own Pokédex.

"Porygon2, the Virtual Pokémon," said Dawn's Pokédex. "With planetary development software installed, it became capable of working in space."

"So, what do we have to do now?" Brock asked.

Porygon2 turned around and suddenly, three small booths had appeared. It turned back to look at the twerps. "Take a seat at those booths. I will explain later."

"How come you can talk?" Ash asked.

"This is the virtual world. Anything's possible," Porygon2 replied. "Plus, it's just simpler that way."

The trio did as Porygon2 asked, sitting at the booths. They each noticed a large button on the panel, just inviting them to push it. Of course, Ash did, and a loud buzzer sounded in response.

Porygon2 sighed and shook its head. "Don't push the button yet. Now, here's what you are going to do. I am going to ask a series of questions and the first one to push the button will get to answer it. If the total of your points at the end add up to a hundred, then you can leave. Each correct answer is worth 20 points."

"So we're having a quiz!" Dawn exclaimed, smiling. "That sounds fun."

"It would be more fun if we weren't in danger of being stuck in the virtual world forever though," Brock complained.

"Okay! Let's do our best, Pikachu!" Ash raised a fist.

"Pika, pika!" Pikachu nodded in determination.

"Question one," said Porygon2. "This Pokémon has an army of clone Pokémon." Inside, it was laughing, thinking that these ignorant twerps couldn't possibly know the answer. After all, how many people even knew about its existence?

Ash and Brock immediately pushed the button. However, it was the light on Brock's booth that started flashing, indicating that he was the one to answer.

"Mewtwo," Brock answered.

"I knew the answer too," Ash sighed, looking disappointed. Pikachu sympathetically patted his shoulder.

Porygon2 blinked in surprise. Now that had been unexpected. "Uh... correct," it said finally. "Next question, this Pokémon has the ability to give people nightmares."

Dawn beat Ash to the button this time. "Darkrai."

"I knew that too," Ash muttered.

Porygon2 seemed mildly exasperated at this point. The questions were supposed to be difficult, but it seemed these twerps actually knew a lot more than it had guessed. Well, in that case, it was time for a trick question. "Correct. Next question... what are the requirements to become a Pokémon Master?"

Ash's fist slammed down on the button. He smiled as the light on his booth started flashing. "Alright, I got this question!"

"Now that I think about it, I don't even know what the answer is," Brock said, looking surprised. "Even though Ash has wanted to become one all this time."

"Yeah, me too," Dawn said, looking over at Ash. "Okay, Ash, what do you have to do then?"

"Well, to become a Pokémon Master, you have to..." Ash broke off, looking thoughtful. A tense silence followed. "You... have to... uh..."

"Pikapi?" Pikachu looked concerned. Why was Ash having difficulty in answering the question all of a sudden?

"Go on, Ash, answer the question," Brock urged. "You're the one who wants to become a Pokémon Master."

"We don't want to wait all day." Dawn rested her chin in one hand, looking bored. "Just spit it out already."

A bead of sweat trickled down Ash's head and he clenched a fist. Why didn't he know the answer to this question? All this time he had been aiming to become a Pokémon Master and not once had he even thought about what he was supposed to do. He had never even met a Pokémon Master either. What _was_ a Pokémon Master anyway? "I don't know," he admitted, hanging his head in despair.

Brock, Dawn and Pikachu's mouths hung open in shock. They had not been expecting that answer.

"Correct. It was a trick question," Porygon2 said.

"What?" Ash's head jerked up in surprise and he stared at the pink and blue Pokémon. "I answered it right?"

"Nobody knows what a Pokémon Master is or what you're supposed to do," Porygon2 explained. "It's a mystery that many people have wondered about, but the answer has never been given. You just say you want to become one to impress people, but really, you don't even have a clue."

Ash was actually at a loss for words. He leaned over on the control panel, putting his head in his arms, and a blue aura surrounded his body as he sank into depression.

"Hey, Ash, at least you got the answer to the trick question right," Dawn said in an effort to cheer him up. "You did well."

"Yes, you've got us a step closer to getting out of here," Brock added. "Good job."

"Pika, pikachu!" Pikachu exclaimed.

"All right then." Ash sat up, looking a little happier. He wasn't happy about his ruse being exposed, but at least he'd finally got to answer a question and got it right. "Bring on the next question, Porygon2."

"Next question then," Porygon2 said. "What move must Aipom learn to evolve into Ambipom?"

Dawn slammed a hand down on the button. "Double Hit," she answered as her light flashed.

Porygon2 started sweating. It was trying so hard to think of difficult questions, but these annoying twerps kept answering every single one right. "Correct..." If they got one more question right, then they would be out of here. It needed to think of a hard question and fast. Another trick question might not work. "This question is going to be a really hard one. Uh... what colour is a shiny Mew?"

Ash, Dawn and Brock stared blankly at Porygon2.

"No idea?" If Porygon2 had a mouth, it would surely be smirking. "Nobody even wants to guess?"

"How would we know something like that?" Dawn protested.

"Well, that was the last question, so if you can't answer it, I guess you're stuck," said Porygon2. "Too bad!"

"What? You never said we only had five questions... you're doing this on purpose, aren't you?" Brock accused.

Ash gritted his teeth in annoyance. Obviously, the only way out of this was to guess. He smacked his hand down on the button, prepared to shout out a completely random colour, thinking about Mew. An ordinary Mew was pink, he knew that much, with blue eyes and... well, he could go with blue.

Dawn and Brock looked his way in shock. They couldn't believe Ash was crazy enough to actually try and answer the question. There was no way he could actually know what the answer was.

"A shiny Mew is... blue?" Ash guessed, nervously watching Porygon2. If he was wrong, they were so screwed.

Porygon2 crashed to the floor, looking stunned. "C...correct..." it moaned. "You all have 100 points in total."

"Yay!" Ash jumped up and did a happy dance. "I did it!"

Meanwhile, because everybody loves a Team Rocket diversion at a crucial moment during the plot, Team Rocket were standing on the doorstep to Mr. Backlot's mansion. James was wearing the best suit he could find, Jessie was wearing a fancy dress and Meowth was wearing a miniature suit of his own. They wanted to look rich themselves, even if they really weren't.

Jessie rang the doorbell and the man who had greeted Ash and company soon came to the door. He regarded the trio with a curious look, not noticing that the smallest member of the group looked suspiciously like a Meowth dressing up. "Welcome to the Pokémon Mansion, home of-"

"Yeah, yeah, rare Pokémon and stuff," Jessie interrupted, smiling. "Can we come in?"

"So, you are Pokémon trainers?" The man asked, looking a little surprised at Jessie's enthusiasm. "Mr. Backlot is always happy to meet trainers."

"We'd be happy to meet him too!" James replied with a big grin.

"We specialise in catching rare Pokémon and giving dem-" Meowth winced as Jessie stepped on his tail. "Uh... da best care any trainer can give." Jessie and James frantically nodded.

"Uh, okay..." The man looked slightly suspicious now, but he stepped aside anyway. "Then, come with me. I shall take you to Mr. Backlot himself."

Jessie, James and Meowth were soon introduced to Mr. Backlot, who was quite happy to start rambling on about his trophy garden.

"I am so proud of my wonderful Trophy Garden and the precious Pokémon who live there," Mr. Backlot was saying. "I always love to go for walks in the trophy garden every day and spend time with the cute and lovely Pokémon. Just yesterday, I was on one of my walks and this adorable little Eevee came..."

"Sir!" the butler hissed, a vein pulsing on his forehead. Mr. Backlot's compulsive lies were starting to get on his nerves. "There are no Eevees in the garden!"

"There aren't?" Mr. Backlot looked at his butler in dismay. He glanced at Team Rocket with a nervous look that they caught and whispered, "Well, go get one then and put it in that garden before they find out I'm a liar."

The butler sighed and rushed out of the room to go get an Eevee. Meowth had heard all the whispers and frantically whispered to Jessie and James what he had overheard.

"We should go after the butler," Jessie murmured.

"If he knows where to get an Eevee, who knows what else he can get," James muttered quietly.

The three Pokémon thieves nodded decisively and straightened, giving the confused Mr. Backlot some disarming smiles.

"Actually, we just remembered we have to be somewhere," Jessie said quickly.

"So, we'll be going now," James added.

"Bye!" Meowth chimed in.

Mr. Backlot blinked slowly as Team Rocket rushed out of the room. Pokémon trainers seemed to get even weirder all the time.

Team Rocket had barely left the room when they saw a door to the right of them at the end of the hallway slamming. Evidently, that was where the butler had gone.

"Oh, wait a minute," a maid standing nearby protested as the trio rushed to the door, "you can't go in..." She broke off as they ignored her, opening the door and hurrying into the room. "Aw, crud."

The butler was indeed in the room. It was a very small and uninteresting looking room, with a large machine placed against the wall. The butler was currently tinkering with the machine.

"That darn Backlot," the butler was saying to himself in annoyance, "always lying about Pokémon in that Trophy Garden. Thank goodness I have this PokéSav Machine to make up for his lies. Now I just have to use it to generate an Eevee."

"You can use that machine to generate a Pokémon?" James asked in disbelief. "How is that even possible?"

"It defies all the laws of physics and everything, but I don't care," Jessie said, her eyes sparkling in wonder. "Just imagine creating lots of rare and legendary Pokémon for the boss."

"Even better, we give him the machine and he can make them himself!" Meowth declared, not at all bothered by the complete violation of ethics despite being a Pokémon himself.

"What the..." The butler turned around in surprise, looking at the trio. "Just who are you?"

"Listen, is that a voice I hear?" Jessie asked.

"It's speaking to me loud and clear," James declared.

"On the wind."

"Past the stars."

"In your ear!" Meowth joined in.

"Bringing chaos at a breakneck pace," Jessie said.

"Dashing hope, bringing fear in its place," James added.

"A rose by any other name smells just as sweet," Jessie continued.

"When everything's worse, our work is complete," James recited.

"Jessie!" Jessie threw off her disguise to reveal her Team Rocket uniform.

"James!" James did the same.

"And Meowth, now dat's a name!" Meowth threw off his suit.

"Putting the do-gooders in their place," said Jessie.

"We're Team Rocket," said James.

"In your face!" The three shouted together.

"Wobbuffet!" Wobbuffet appeared to join in.

"Mime, mime!" Mime Jr. also had to contribute to the motto.

"So you are Pokémon thieves?" The butler cringed and flattened himself against the machine. "Wouldn't you rather steal real Pokémon?"

"You can't tell the difference between a real Pokémon and one generated from that machine, right?" James asked.

"Uh... that's true," admitted the butler. "I have to use it to cover up for my master's lies after all. It wouldn't be good if those trainers learned he was a liar."

"Well then, what does it matter?" Jessie smirked. "Now hand over that machine so that we can give it to our boss."

"But... I can't!" The butler protested. "Without it... my master will be exposed as a compulsive liar and all those Pokémon trainers will be so disappointed when they don't find a certain Pokémon in that garden."

"Looks like we're just going to have to take it by force den," Meowth said, smiling deviously.

"Come out, Seviper!" Jessie threw Seviper's Poké Ball.

"Carnivine, go!" James shrieked as Carnivine promptly jumped on his head and flailed around. "Get off!"

The butler knew when he was screwed. There was no time to turn back to the machine and generate a super powerful legendary Pokémon to battle them either. After getting a hefty beating up from Seviper and Carnivine, he was tied up and thrown to one corner of the room. Jessie, James and Meowth approached the machine, looking at it curiously.

"You know, it's pretty big," James pointed out.

"We'll have to figure out how to get it out of here. I doubt it's even going to fit through the door," Jessie said.

"Well then, it's time for Deus Ex Mech #500 to employ!" Meowth pressed a button and the entire wall behind the machine came crashing down, courtesy of a mech that resembled a cross between a bulldozer and a crane.

"When did we build that?" James asked.

Jessie shrugged. "I have no idea."

"That's why it's called a Deus Ex Mech." Meowth grinned, looking proud of himself.

The butler watched on in horror as Team Rocket ran out to climb into the mech and seized his precious PokéSav machine, laughing deviously as they pulled off one of their more successful theft attempts in a while. At least, they hoped it would be successful.

"Normally, the twerps come to stop us by now," Meowth said, looking through the window. "How strange. Where did they get to?"

Speaking of the twerps, they had left the strange room with the psychedelic colours and the flashing lights, as well as Porygon2, behind. They were walking through a hallway that led to the next room. At the end of the hallway, they were surprised to open the door and find a comfortable looking lounge.

"Uh...?" Dawn walked into the room, raising an eyebrow and putting her hands on her hips. "Is somebody living here?"

"It's not too shabby," Brock commented, looking around the room. It actually had a television and a very comfy looking sofa facing it.

"Cool!" Ash plopped down on the sofa. "Maybe we can watch some TV."

"This isn't the time to be watching television," Dawn protested. "We're supposed to get out of here."

"What if this is our next test?" Brock mused. "I wonder what we're supposed to do now."

Suddenly, a deformed version of Porygon2 with a detached head and swirly eyes popped out of the television, causing Ash to yell in shock. He certainly had not seen that coming. The strange looking Pokémon twirled around in the air before him.

"What is this?" Ash brought out his Pokédex, evidently forgetting about Porygon playing with it.

"Porygon-Z, the other Pokémon that the anime will probably pretend does not exist," said the Pokédex. "Originating in Sinnoh, it may never be seen just like Porygon2. Will the anime ever admit that we exist and just show us already?"

"My Pokédex is not a toy!" Ash put it away, looking frustrated. "Every single time... will you just cut it out already?"

"Let's see what the real entry is," Dawn said, taking out her Pokédex.

"Porygon-Z, the Virtual Pokémon," said Dawn's Pokédex. "Additional software was installed to make it a better Pokémon. It began acting oddly, however."

"It certainly looks odd as well," Brock commented. "Like a messed up version of Porygon2."

"So, Porygon-Z, you got something for us to do?" Dawn asked.

"We would like to get out of here soon," Ash said. "Please let this be the last thing we need to do."

"The test, this is," said Porygon-Z in a garbled voice. "TV, you watch. Keep sane, you must. Ten minutes, you are to withstand. Fail and be trapped forever, you will."

"So, uh... if we manage to watch TV for ten minutes without losing our minds, we pass?" Dawn asked in confusion.

"Correct, you are," replied Porygon-Z.

"That sounds easy." Brock sat on the couch next to Ash. "This should be an interesting test."

"Watching TV for ten minutes? I can do that." Dawn sat to the other side of Ash, putting Piplup on her lap.

"There is no chance we will be trapped forever with something as easy as this," Ash said confidently. He couldn't see anything difficult about watching television for ten minutes.

"Then, turn on the TV, I will!" Porygon-Z turned to the TV and activated it. "Prepared to suffer, you are, yes?" It snickered and then disappeared into the television set.

 _Pokemon Go!_ started playing on the television. Unfortunately, it was the same version that had been used in the Mastermind of Mirage Pokémon. When it came to an end and a silence followed, the trio sighed in relief, thinking that the torture of their eardrums was over. They couldn't have been more wrong as the movie version of _We Will Be Heroes_ began to play. Then, when that ended, _Cele-B-R-A-T-E_ from the ending of the Celebi movie started playing.

"Hey, this is kind of catchy!" Dawn grinned. "Let's Cele-B-R-A-T-E!" she sang.

"I can't take this anymore!" Ash screamed, jumping to his feet and holding his head in his hands. First two bad songs and now an annoyingly catchy one? He just couldn't handle it. "Pikachu, use your Thunderbolt attack!"

"We still have a minute left, Ash." Brock had been keeping track of the time. "Just hold on a bit longer."

"Chuuu." Pikachu badly wanted to shock the TV to a charred lump, but he didn't want them to be trapped forever.

"It's only been nine minutes?" Ash fell back on the couch, looking pained. "Are you sure?"

A minute later, the TV turned off. Ash sighed in relief. Even Brock seemed a little relieved that it was over. Dawn, on the other hand, didn't seem too bothered. Pikachu and Piplup looked tired.

"Passed the test, you have!" Porygon-Z appeared. "Let you go, I must. A shame, it is, but to play, that was all we wanted. Lonely and hated, we are. A disappointment, it is."

"That's terrible," Dawn said sadly. "Being shunned for something that wasn't even your fault... how long has it been anyway?"

"Pretty long," Brock replied. "I guess nobody is willing to forget about it anytime soon."

"It's so stupid." Ash clenched a fist. "Porygon's evolutions had nothing to do with it. The only thing Porygon was guilty of was starring in that episode."

"Send you back, I will," said Porygon-Z. "The fun, it is over."

Before the trio could do anything, they had disappeared in flashes of blue light and reappeared in the Trophy Garden, in the same place where they were last seen.

"Pory!" Porygon flew around their heads, looking happy. "Porygon!"

"Help!" Mr. Backlot came running out of the mansion toward the Pokémon trainers. "Some Pokémon thieves came and tied up my butler, then they knocked down part of my mansion and stole his machine! You have to stop them!"

The Porygon blinked in surprise as the trio of Pokémon trainers ignored it and ran toward the Pokémon mansion. Stopping a certain bunch of Pokémon thieves was much more important than telling off some mischievous Pokémon after all.

Team Rocket was making a very slow getaway in their mech. In fact, they had barely even left the garden when they heard a familiar shout.

"Team Rocket!" Ash cried out.

"Oh no, it's the twerp," James groaned.

"Those twerps sure took their time to get here," Jessie said, looking at Ash, Brock and Dawn in surprise. "I wonder what took them so long?"

"Would it help if we said we weren't stealing any Pokémon?" Meowth asked weakly. "We're just stealing a machine that can create any Pokémon in the world."

"A machine that creates Pokémon?" Brock looked horrified. "That's just unethical. It violates the laws of nature!"

"Where did you get such a machine?" Dawn asked.

"Mr. Backlot's own butler had it," Jessie replied smugly. "Sounds like Mr. Backlot is a big liar, so the butler randomly creates a Pokémon with the machine to make up for it."

"We're gonna take it to our boss so he can create any Pokémon he likes!" James declared. "This PokéSav machine is going to get us a big promotion."

"That's terrible!" Ash yelled angrily. "Using a machine to make a Pokémon... it's just wrong! I can't forgive somebody who does that!" He pointed at the machine which was dangling from the crane. "Pikachu, Thunderbolt attack now!"

Team Rocket gasped in horror as Pikachu leaped into the air, sending a massive bolt of electricity toward the PokéSav machine. The amount of electricity that hit it was enough to make it explode. This explosion in turn caused the mech to blow up. Team Rocket promptly went soaring into the sky.

"We're blasting off again!" Jessie, James and Meowth screamed, before disappearing in a flash of light.

Mr. Backlot and the butler soon came running up, shocked to see the smoking wreckage left outside their garden.

"My Pokésav machine!" the butler cried out, clutching his head with his hands. "It's ruined!"

"Can you make a new one?" Mr. Backlot asked his butler anxiously. "I'm not sure how long I will be able to avoid lying. I am a pathological liar, see. It's just so hard not to lie."

"You actually made that machine?" Dawn looked at the butler with a shocked expression.

"How could you create such a thing?" Brock asked, looking quite annoyed. "Pokémon should not just be created by a machine."

"Pokémon should come into the world naturally." Ash clenched a fist. "You are just making Pokémon in a machine then putting them in that garden so that trainers will think they are real? How must those Pokémon think knowing they weren't even born, but came from some machine? You should be ashamed of yourself!"

"Pika!" Pikachu agreed vehemently.

"Piplup, pip!" Piplup looked fierce.

"I think we should go..." the butler said hesitantly, putting a hand on Mr. Backlot's arm.

"Me too." Mr. Backlot had a huge sweatdrop and was smiling nervously. "Run for it."

Ash, Brock and Dawn watched in surprise as Mr. Backlot and the butler ran toward the mansion as fast as they possibly could, slamming the door behind themselves.

"I don't think we're going to get any answers out of them." Dawn sighed, shaking her head.

"I just don't believe it." Brock put a hand on his forehead in despair. "How could anybody even think of something like that? Creating Pokémon... it's just ridiculous."

"Well, at least the machine was destroyed," Ash said, looking triumphant. "With any luck, the butler won't try making another one. Now, let's go to Hearthome City. My next badge awaits."

With that, Ash and company set off into the sunset.

_After an exciting adventure involving banned Pokémon, Ash is aiming for his fifth badge. Will the gym leader have returned by the time they reach Hearthome City? To be continued._


End file.
